With the Holy Spirit

Friday, September 19, 2008

Half the semester has flown past. Yet I'm still drunk with ecstasy from the happenings of World Youth Day Sydney 2008 and my calling to missions.

It's my 3rd year of semester, and I have decided that I will break the bond to go to France. It is a price to pay. But the price to pay is better than the consequences that I have to bear should I leave for medical school, God-willing.

Meeting Sherly for dinner was a good thing. She left me 2 choices: Do I want to,

1) Choose the safer choice and stay where I am or...
2) Go after my dream.

There are big dreams, dreams that I've never had the guts to chase:

When I was 3, I wanted to be a doctor cuz I was always in and out of the hospital.
When I turned 12, I wanted to be a lawyer cuz Mama said I argued too much and I could out-talk her.
When I turned 13, I wanted to be a marine biologist cuz I could go scuba diving and go globe-trotting.
When I turned 14, I wanted to be a religious cuz I found the Catholic faith so compelling.
When I turned 16, I wanted to be a doctor once again...this time, as a pathologist to cut up dead people cuz it wouldn't be painful for dead people.
And when I turned 18, I found my dream going back to where I always wanted to be since the age of 3...
And now that I am going to turn 21, I have not looked back since.
Perhaps the dream was refined to suit the bigger picture of missionary with the vision to heal and evangelize, pediatrics and family. Still, the dream remains just as it was.

Circumstances seem so predictable yet unpredictable. The timings are so accurate, yet the future turns out to be a mystery. Everything seems to go chop chop chop...falling into place, yet not really. And plans seem to be set in place, yet what holds me back is uncertainty. It seems that God knows what He is doing, but honestly, I don't know what He is doing.

Thank you darling, for supporting me in more ways than one. Though insignificant to many, it means everything to me when you reach out to touch my heart and embrace mine with yours. Reminding us always to look towards Jesus and fill ourselves with His love *hugz* Only with you, and the Holy Spirit, to whom I can draw this picture with, to make the painting whole and complete. Though the process of it is messy, accompanying tears, sorrows and frustrations, the painting finished will be a beautiful masterpiece and a sight to behold for all who witness it to its completion =)

-Yours truly ;