With the Holy Spirit

Thursday, January 12, 2006

My comp crashed again. *sigh* Well, at least it's working now =) It's been raining and raining and raining..I guess you can call it showers of blessings. I didn't think they were at first. At least not on sunday when the first day of continuous showers begun. I felt really upset the whole day. The whole day was filled with quarrels at home and just when I thought that everything was going to turn out fine, I received a message from my friends that Miss Devi passed away in the evening. Miss Devi was my literature teacher in KC. I cried myself to sleep that night. I missed her. I couldn't accept the fact that she was gone and that I would never see her ever again. Although I knew that during those years in KC, I wasn't an outstanding Lit student because Miss Devi always gave me marks that could barely scrape through, I remembered that during those times when I was about to give up on Lit, she stayed back with Jac and I and gave all the time that she had to tutor us. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw my results for Lit 'O' levels. For the first time ever, I got an A1!!! From being someone who always can never graspe and understand the funny English of the long-gone William Shakespeare and see light from dark in modern short stories, I learnt how to read deeper and understand emotions better. I'll never forget that time when she told us to tell Mrs Lim that we were embracing the romantic darkness when we didn't switch on the lights. She said, "Girls..I bet you that when you tell Mrs Lim that, she'll say ,"For how long?" I didn't believe Mrs Lim would be so silly as to say that. But lo, when she came, she asked us what we were doing in the dark and someone said, "Oh, Mrs Lim! We are embracing the romantic darkness la" Then she asked us. "ohh..I see. Uh..for how long ah girls?" Wa...that was it. The whole class burst out laughing.
*sigh* those were the days...
Realised then that it's true that God has greater plans in Heaven than on Earth for Miss Devi is up there in heaven with God and his army of angels. Praise the Lord for his goodness!!!

Suddenly it dawned on me that anytime, we can be gone from this Earth and while we are still living and breathing, we must treasure our loved ones so that when it is time to leave, there will be no regrets. Often, it is said that when you are born, you are crying but the people around you are smiling. But may it be so that when it is time to go, the people around you are crying but you are smiling. Isn't that so true to what we desire to be so when the time comes?

My friend and I met the strange guy again the day before yesterday. This was the second time we met. Our meeting wasn't coincidental. It was planned. We wanted to see the man. But it was almost close to impossible that we would meet because the man would only turn up at the coffee shop during the wee hours of the morning. It was early then. Very early. But he was there. Boy were we surprised. He told us himself that usually he would come out of the house much later, but this time, for the first time, he came out early because he knew that somehow, he was going to meet us. He gave us this book.
The chapter I turned to when the man urged me to turn was on the Test of true love. The word of God wrote,

"My child, many an affection is mistaken for true love until it is put to the test. Only time and trials prove how genuine your love for Me is. Both the time and the trials are given to you in your daily life..."

The other chapter my friend turned to was on the Nature of Love. The word of God wrote,

"My child, love is the greatest virtue of any man. It makes him resemble Me most closely. Love brings many other virtues into the soul. It makes a man devoted, sincere, patient, loyal, long-suffering, courageous, sensitive, prudent, unselfish, pleasant and strong...
True love consists in wanting to give. It is a reasonable thing. It sees the worth of the loved one and seeks to please him."

How apt those chapters were. Especially when the last few days were one of the darkest days I was going through and I had many questions in my mind. Questions for God which He answered me as I read the paragraphs on the chosen chapter.

P.S. To this friend of mine, I'm sorry I accused you. I'm sorry I made you feel the way you feel. Sometimes, I don't know what is going, and I'm sorry if I haven't been sensitive. I don't know what else I can do to make amends, not when you tell me that our friendship is over =(

-Yours truly ;